


like ships passing in the night

by Anonymous



Category: Devil May Cry, Dissidia: Final Fantasy
Genre: Crack, Crossdressing, Gen, I Don't Even Know, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, No Plot/Plotless, V (Devil May Cry) in a dress
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-27
Updated: 2019-10-27
Packaged: 2021-01-04 09:44:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21195605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Miss Cloud encounters someone else braving the battlefield in a dress.





	like ships passing in the night

**Author's Note:**

> The setting/premise for this fic was heavily inspired by the Dissida: Final Fantasy [Allure of Honey](https://archiveofourown.org/works/356782) series by Sinnatious, but the entirety of whatever passes as a plot is predicated upon [this picture](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/573391022827110400/637931401496494080/Owen_Hamze_Updo.png) of Owen Hamze with a most beautiful hairdo and some semi-coherent conversations with friends. I. I don't know. I have no excuses. This is why you don't write fic in the witching hour.

Cloud huffed in irritation as he pulled his heels out of the soft soil again. Pretty as his Miss Cloud outfit was, it was extremely impractical for walking around a battlefield. His heels were probably a lost cause at this point, but he wasn't ready to give them up completely and go barefoot. Yet. He glanced around, hitching the sleeves of the Silk Dress up where they were slipping off his shoulders again. Off in the distance, a single bird was circling high in the sky. It was too far off to tell whether it was a vulture or something, but it couldn't hurt to go check. Cloud sighed, and began walking in the direction of the bird, trying to keep his weight forward and his heels out of the dirt.

  
When he reached the foot of the tree, he blinked in surprise. Halfway up the trunk someone in a fancy voluminous gown was tied standing on one of the branches. Their hair was done up in a crown braid far fancier than Cloud's own wig; bare feet peeked out from beneath the hem of the gown. He looked up; the bird had disappeared.

  
"Hello," Cloud said cautiously, "Do you need help getting down from there?"

  
The figure heaved a sigh. "Your assistance would be appreciated," they called down in a light scratchy baritone.  
He wouldn't be able to reach the other person in these heels. Cloud kicked the shoes off with gleeful satisfaction, then carefully set them aside; he couldn't afford to waste gil replacing his shoes. "I'm Cloud, by the way."

  
"Cloud, hmm? I'm V," came the reply. Cloud paused, waiting. "My name is literally just V, that's it," the voice came again.

  
"Why the dress?" Cloud asked, stepping back to eye the branches of the tree. If he could find some that would hold his weight, it'd be much faster to jump up than climb the trunk. He bounced on his toes. "It's not exactly practical." A snort came from up above him. "Well, I've got no other choice," he said defensively. "My acquaintances sold all my stuff to pay for their new armor, and this outfit was the best I could afford with what was left over. What's your story?"

  
"A joke," came the sardonic reply. "Several acquaintances informed me that if it was my lot to always be the damsel in distress, I should look the part as well."

  
Cloud finally reached the branch V was tied to and set to work undoing the rope. This close, he noticed that V had two full sleeves of tattoos running up his arms and possibly further, if the hint of black lines peeking out at their neckline was any indication. "Nice ink."

  
"Thank you."

  
"Nice hair, too." Up close, V's hairdo looked even more intricate than it had on the ground; small whorls of hair were tucked into each other all around their head, with no free ends evident. "How'd you tuck all the ends in like that?"

  
V shrugged as much as they could in the ropes. "I'm not exactly sure. One of my friends styled it after they tied me to the tree here. I'd be glad to introduce you if you'd like some pointers."

  
"As long as the lesson doesn't require being tied to a tree," Cloud replied wryly. "Well," he grunted, finally undoing the knot (he _really_ needed to get something with a sharp edge; as effective as the Sexy Cologne was against the forces of Chaos, not having easy access to a good slicing edge was going to drive him crazy) "there's you untied. Do you need a hand down?" he asked, eyeing the drop. It wasn't too bad a drop, even carrying someone, although the fabric of the gown might get in the way.

  
"No need," V murmured, reaching out with their hand. Cloud flinched as several of the inked lines writhed off their skin and burst into a cloud of shadow. When he turned back, the shadows had resolved themselves into the bird he'd seen on the way over. Before he could do anything, V stepped off the branch, plummeting towards the earth. Cursing, Cloud leapt after them. The bird swooped in and grabbed V's raised arm, slowing their descent, then wheeled off into the distance.

  
Cloud let out an "oomph!" as he impacted the ground with his bare feet, wincing as he narrowly missed several sharp-looking rocks scattered around the ground, and went to put his heels back on. He felt V watching curiously as he wrestled with the straps, and looked up, remembering V was also barefoot. "Uh, are you going to be okay walking around without shoes?" he asked awkwardly. "I can carry you until we find some shoes for you, if not."

  
The bird flew back, a white cane clutched in its talons, just in time to hear Cloud's words. "He's fine, Princess doesn't need shoes," it squawked. "He's still got enough magic to get around just fine."

  
V shot the bird an annoyed look, but dipped his head in acknowledgement. "Griffon is correct," he said quietly. He held up his hand, palm up, and Griffon left the cane in his grasp. He tapped the tip of the cane against the ground, and another cloud of shadows writhed off his skin and sank into the ground, boiling around the edges of his gown in ways that made Cloud flinch and eye it warily. "My thanks, for rescuing me," V continued, "I should go find my companions now."

  
"The same...companions...who stuck you in the tree in the first place?" Cloud asked, skeptical.

  
"The very same." V's mouth tilted in a slashing smirk. "Given the effort they expended to place me in that situation, it would be churlish not to reciprocate." He turned, the shadows at his feet swirling in migraine-inducing patterns. "My thanks for your assistance, Cloud." He sped away on his platform of shadows, skirts flying, the bird gliding after him high above.

  
Cloud watched V's silhouette shrink in the distance, bemused. Then, he cursed. His heels had sunk into the dirt _again_. He yanked them out of the road once more with an aggrieved sigh, and minced away to kill some more manikins.


End file.
